The Barking Dog

Shortlisted in Short Fiction category for Letter Review Prize, July-Sept 2024

CLARA

You think weird things only happen to other people, then something legitimately weird happens to you. My mom says I’m too trusting, but I used to think most people were good. Nice, I mean. Normal? Now I’m starting to think it’s more complicated than that. I’m not saying she was right, but—here’s what happened.

A barking dog woke me up early a few mornings ago. I tried to get back to sleep, but the noise rolled around in my head like a quarter in a washing machine: arf, arf, arf, arf!

I sat up. Whoever owned that dog should make it shut up, I thought to myself. Seriously. Someone should investigate.

Then I thought, maybe I should investigate. I imagined the dog barking next to a toddler at the bottom of a well or a bear cub up in a tree. Someone has to help them, right? Why not me?

IVAN

Op encountered unforeseen complication this morning. After injecting microchip containing sensitive docs into my shoulder last night and destroying originals by submerging them in hot water, pulverizing with immersion blender, and discarding down kitchen drain, Officer (alias “SONYA”) slipped in shower around 0600 hours today. She hit her head and injured herself, possibly seriously.

I witnessed the fall, as I was nearby on bathroom rug. I raised the alarm, attracting unwanted attention, but I had no choice as she needed immediate medical help. I was confident that her role in the op would remain ambiguous should the premises be searched. Officer S is meticulous about destroying evidence and, as a dog, I am obviously discreet. I planned to escape in the excitement, while paramedics’ attention was diverted.

I was thwarted by a teenager.

CLARA

In the driveway, dressed in my red Krispy Kreme uniform with my black apron and name tag, I had my hand on the car door. That dog was still barking like a berserker. I never had one, but he sounded really upset. It didn’t sound like there was a squirrel teasing him, or another dog just walking by his house. This was panic.

So, I went to check it out. I probably shouldn’t have, but I just thought, maybe I can help. It’s probably nothing, but if I’m interviewed on KBAY News for doing a rescue, my Mom will have to be proud of me even though she was worried. She’d have to admit I did a good thing.

IVAN

I was prepared to fight if necessary. My priority was delivery of the digital asset, not protection of S per se. When the doorbell rang and someone knocked, S was moaning. I put my nose to her face to assess her injuries: I detected internal bleeding and possibly broken bone. About ten minutes later, I heard sirens. Confident that S would receive medical care, I turned to the primary directive: safe delivery of the asset lodged in my shoulder.

CLARA

I thought the police would kick down the door because that’s what they do in the movies, but instead they used a crowbar and made a jagged hole where the lock was, like when you open a box that’s got too much strapping tape on it. It was a mess.

They told me to stay outside and went in with a dog snare. The dog was growling but they cornered him and put a choke leash on him. Then they walked around and yelled and opened all the doors in the house. After a minute one of them came out to use the radio in the patrol car. I heard him say a woman fell in the shower and broke something. They had to put a towel on her because she didn’t have any clothes on.

One of the police officers had curly hair and big biceps. He must work out a lot. He probably thought I was at least twenty because he let me stand in the bathroom door while we waited for the ambulance. The woman was lying on the floor, half in the shower and half out, like a fish in a boat bottom. They made a pillow for her with a towel and told her she was going to be okay but they didn’t want to move her.

The cute cop sat on the toilet, and I could see a purple rose tattoo behind his ear. I leaned on the door and let my pant cuff ride up so he could see the tattoo on my ankle. He asked me where I worked and I told him Krispy Kreme. He said he goes there sometimes. Maybe we’ll see each other.

The other guy was working the radio thing and dealing with the dog. It was one of those muscly little pit bulls, with a white and grey body. The dog was growling, and when he pulled on the choke leash it made him cough and wheeze. I felt sorry for him, so I told him it was okay. I rubbed the fur between his ears and loosened the choke. We’re going to take care of your human, I said.

Then the policeman asked me if I could take the dog home for a day or two. I said I guess so but I don’t know what my mom is going to say. He took my name and number and I found a bag of dog food and a leash in the kitchen.

Carrying the bag and holding the dog leash on the way home, I felt good. I helped that lady and now I was taking care of her dog. Maybe I’ll be on the news tonight. Light was sparkling in the trees. I’m going to call him Cupcake.

IVAN aka CUPCAKE

I was taken to a nearby residence by the girl Clara (mobile phone 804-621-1553). House is three doors down from S’s home. Yellow one-story ranch with white shutters, in need of repair. Two cars in driveway: late model Ford and compact Honda. California plates. Clara is seventeen or eighteen years old, medium build, unkempt auburn hair, acne, nose ring, tortoise-shell glasses, red uniform shirt and bird tattoo on inside left ankle.

I attempted to escape two or three times during the short walk to her residence, but she held me firmly and the choke leash prevented it. I will escape when she lets me out to relieve myself later. Stand by. Do not interfere. Clara is a minor and unwitting of this op.

CLARA
Cupcake will be okay for a couple hours in my room while I’m at work. I got down on my hands and knees and told him that I will take care of him, and everything is going to be OK, but please please, don’t bark. I’ll be back soon.

I left a note for my mom in the kitchen. She is going to love this. NOT.

IVAN
Clara’s guardian “Mom” may be exploitable. She works from home and is actively disinterested in me, so I may be able to misdirect her attention if she lets me out. She briefly entered the bedroom where I am being detained. She had on makeup, silk blouse and sweat pants. To build rapport, I wagged my tail, but she said, “What the hell,” and closed the door again.

I must be patient.

CLARA

At work I kept thinking about Cupcake. I couldn’t wait to get home to check on him. When I checked my messages during break, there was one from the cop (not the cute one, the other one). He said the lady’s name was Sonya. He said, ‘she says thank you and please leave the dog outside tonight in your backyard, he’ll be fine’. I didn’t know about that though because it was going to be cold and rainy.

Also, the cop said that Sonya had a concussion and broke a vertebra so she’d be a couple days in the hospital and even after she went home she couldn’t take care of a dog for a while. I don’t know why, but I was glad. I decided to stop at the pet store on the way home and get Cupcake a toy.

Then the weirdest thing happened. I was working the register when some guy stood up fast. His coffee tipped over, and he started waving his arms. We all realized at the same time that he was choking. I was behind the counter or I would have tried the Heimlich Maneuver but someone else got there first and hit him really hard on the back. It made him projectile vomit on the floor, but then he made a loud breathing in sound. He started to cry. He thanked the guy and a bunch of people came over and patted him on the back and shook that guy’s hand. Then I cleaned up the mess. What a crazy day.

IVAN

Stand down from exfiltration attempt. Do not involve the girl.

Overnight she kept me in her bedroom rather than putting me outside as S requested. Around 0200 hours I detected an attempt to open the window from outside. Note: Window is locked. Do not put Clara in harm’s way and risk blowing op. I will make a second escape attempt in the morning.

Repeat: Stand down exfiltration attempt. Wait nearby for warm turnover.

CLARA

The next morning, Mom was waiting for me in the kitchen. She was wearing a t-shirt that said JUST DO IT and no bra. She was stressed out. We get along and everything, but she doesn’t understand that I’m not going to live with her forever and I’m going to make my own decisions. I’m going to get my own place and maybe Sonya won’t want Cupcake back so I can keep him.

“Let’s have a chat,” Mom said. I hate when she says that. I sat down across from her with a thump, and she opened her mouth, looked at me, then closed it. Then she said, “Take out the nose ring.” Her laptop was open because she does Zoom calls for work but she reached over and snapped the cover down.

“I will when I get to work. That’s not what you’re mad about.”

“I’m not mad. But Honey, you can’t go dancing onto a stranger’s property at the crack of dawn! What if the person had a gun?”

“Mom, nobody had a gun. The lady needed help. I called the police. I thought you’d be proud of me. Didn’t you teach me about being kind?”

“Of course I’m proud of you. Of course you should be kind. But I worry.”

I stood up. “Trust me, Mom. I have to go to work. Could you let Cupcake out around lunch? Use the leash so he doesn’t run? Please?”

IVAN

Circa 1300 hours, ‘Mom’ connected my leash, so I waited for my opportunity. I made a break for it when she was locking the door and had the leash under her arm. I proceeded at speed down the street to the black BMW. Officer “NIKITA” opened the car door and I jumped in. As we exited the street, I looked back. Mom was pursuing us.

CLARA

Two guys wearing jackets and ties came into Krispy Kreme. They didn’t want donuts. They asked to speak to the manager, and I had a bad feeling on the back of my neck when the manager looked sideways at me.

They asked me to come with them. A couple of people with mugs of coffee were staring as I went out.  

IVAN

En route to southern border following two vehicle changes and personnel handoff. Officer “VLADIMIR” at the wheel. Am staying out of sight. If all goes well, we will be in Tijuana by nightfall. Appreciate close support from Los Angeles.

Request San Jose immediate effort to exfil S. To prevent detection, am going dark for now. Signing off.

I shall miss Clara. She was a good kid.

CLARA

The two guys took me to a Crown Vic with big antennas on it. It was like a perp walk on tv. They even showed me their badges and said they had questions for me. That’s when my stomach flipped into my gizzard.

They opened the car door and Mom was in the back seat, crying. I got in next to her.

“What’s going on?!” I said.

She was white as donut flour. “It’s Cupcake.”

“What do you mean?!” I was really freaking out now. “What about Cupcake? Are those guys FBI?”

“Cupcake is a spy.” I didn’t understand, like she was speaking Swedish. Like, what does that actually mean?

She told me she felt bad when Cupcake ran away, like she had let me down, so she ran back for her car keys and started chasing the black car that took Cupcake. She went like two blocks when a police car pulled her over and she saw another police car follow the black car. She said these guys think the dog is carrying intelligence information!

I said, “Are you kidding me? You chased them? Mom, those guys probably had guns for real!” She says I shouldn’t get involved.

Still, and I’m not going to say this to her, but what were we supposed to do? I would still help a barking dog or a choking person. I’d try anyway. Wouldn’t you?